A beautiful process for someone who is dying, is to honor 'the five things' with the loved ones they will be leaving behind. Saying these five things can be an extraordinary way to heal the heart. They are: "Forgive me", "I forgive you", "thank you", "I love you", "goodbye".
Why not say them to our loved ones each morning, each night, each moment. We are all terminal, so why wait for a diagnosis. No doubt, the five things will be perpetually appropriate, while we walk this planet, in these human skins. When seemingly reaching a state when these five things no longer need saying, say them anyway, because they are so beautiful.
Forgive me, I forgive you, thank you, I love you, goodbye,
The invitation is to leave it alone. To let life be. To know yourself as being lived. That is what is happening here. Life is alive as you, through your breath, through your being. Don't look for it elsewhere. It does you and undoes you, over and over again. You are not the doer. Stop claiming that you are, and your relentless despair of knowing you are not, will dissolve. The belief in the doer, in the future, in something rich and magical beyond this place, is what deadens you, and crushes your heart. The belief in something greater than this has held you captive, left you for dead. And yet you fear death. The only death you will ever know is this lifeless longing. Question these beliefs, awaken from them, and live it out loud. Then you will know yourself as boundless life, as freedom, and your body will age and die fully alive, without regret, endlessly beautiful.
Analisa Domenica is a naturalist minister and mentor, in private practice as a Doula for living and dying. She offers private mentoring sessions, end-of-life preparation & transition support, bereavement, home death, funeral, and natural burial guidance, and laying-on-of-hands for comfort care and pain release. Analisa joyfully celebrates weddings and memorials, according to your faith or secular tradition. She is available to private clients, small groups, and for public education. Find out more about her by clicking here.
'Li' lives and works in Mill Spring, NC, a stone or two's throw from Asheville, NC and Greenville/Spartanburg, SC. She also works globally via phone and zoom. You may reach her by phone at 828.429.0096 or write to her by clicking here.